Sometimes I just need to give myself a break. A break from my everyday life, with all its mundane routines, with its everyday cares and concerns, and all the "what if's" that come with the possibilities of tomorrow. A break to simply let go of my worst worries and fears, my responsibilities and obligations. A break that simply allows me to back up and punt, to re-group, re-think, and that doesn't require putting in a whole lot of thought into the details. A break that helps me to once again celebrate who I am and what is truly important in my life. Without realizing that was what was actually taking place, I truly had the most amazing weekends that I have had in a long time! I know that I enjoyed it so much because everything that Don and I did was so spontaneous, so spur-of-the-moment, without much thought to anything else, and assisted in establishing a renewed sense of wonderment with each other.
It all began on Friday, when I decided I'd like to have a break from cooking dinner at home. I allowed my inner voice to guide me and chose to dine on some fine Mexican food at Mi Jalapeno's. Don thought that sounded like a good idea, so off we went. Everything about our experience there was simply awesome! From the food we dined on, to the good friends we ran into, to the good times we shared with another. At the end of our meal, both of us felt completely satisfied, although I was a bit buzzed from having a few maragaritas! Armed with a re-newed sense of self-assurance, {hahaha} I decided to go to the Moose BY MYSELF while Don worked and could join me there afterward. I think sometimes that I get so caught up in the "us" of our relationship, that I forget to take time to simply be "me". This stems from the fact that I am not normally one who likes to go anywhere and do much of anything alone, especially out in public, desiring and preferring to have someone along with me, so therefore I tend not to do some of the things that I might really enjoy. Anyways, upon arriving and throwing caution into the wind, I instantly spotted some friends of ours who invited me to sit with them. We chatted with one another, catching up, reminiscing, joked around about some of our personal experiences, teased one another, shot a few games of pool together and waited for to Don arrived. Once he made it in from working, we moved to the ballroom side of the Moose to listen to the the band, Heartbreak. They aren't the most amazing band I've ever heard but I enjoyed the variety of music that they played and I swear I was on the dance floor dancing most of the night! It is nice to be able to go somewhere where you know people who enjoy the same things that you do and who make it so easy to join in. It is hard for Don to dance due to the CPA; but a willing friend who recently lost his loved one provided me with a couple of slow dances. Needless to say, we didn't make it home until well after 1 a.m. and on Saturday, I slept in, puttered around the house, and relished in the moment of accomplishing absolutely nothing, while Don worked into early in the evening.
Upon arriving home, we ate some leftover beef and noodles that I cooked on Thursday, and decided to spent the night at home. So we ventured to Family Video to picked up a few new releases before returning home once again to relax and watch them. If you haven't seen the romantic drama,"The Lake House" with Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock and enjoyed the movie, "The Notebook", based on the novel written by Nicholas Sparks, you've got to see this movie! Don and I both enjoyed it and will one day add it to our DVD collection. We finished the night off watching, "Just My Luck" another romantic but comical movie.
On Sunday morning, we spent some time with Chaos, throwing his ball so he could run off some the over-abundance of energy that he certainly possesses. After totally and completely wearing him out, we ventured off to Polaris Parkway. With no real goal in mind, other than to enjoy the day together and have a nice, quiet dinner at the Texas Roadhouse. We ended up stopping into Target first, where we picked up a few necessities for our home, a few stocking stuffers for Christmas, browsed through the Christmas aisles, talking about Christmas past and family traditions before proceeding for dinner. At the Texas Roadhouse, we enjoyed one another's quiet company,allowing each other to get lost in their own thoughts. I love those moments... especially when you just feel yourself smiling as you remember a tender moment spent together and look up and see your soulmate smiling back at you. Is there anything better? No words are needed, you're simply content to be where you are, relinquishing into pure bliss. Afterwards, our conversation turned once again to the upcoming holiday season, who we desire to buy for, gift ideas we have, which lead us into Old Navy to pick up a few thermal pullover for my dad. While there, I find myself within the aisles of the baby/toddlers area of the store and had to laugh at myself. I commented about it to Don, not believing that I'd even be within these aisles thinking of purchasing yet another item to shower upon Alexxis. Don gently put his arm around me and laughing with me said, "You're being a beautiful grandma!" I so loved that.
As we ventured off, browsing through a few more stores, chatting ever so carelessly, I remember all over again why I feel in love in with him in the first place. He is my sheltering tree, with roots so deep in a self-assured confidence and acceptance of who he is, a sentimentalist into his own family traditions, with a solid trunk to keep him grounded, able to weather whatever storm that may come his way, with branches and limbs that reach up high into the sky never being afraid to take a risk to achieve his dreams, even if the branches may fearfully sway ever so dangerously from time to time. He reminds me of that...a sheltering tree, with the necessity to simply let go and live, to take risks, to make time to play with those gently swaying branches, enjoying the sunshine as it shines from time to time upon my face, to experience the coolness and relaxing qualities provided by its shade, to be here, now, in the moments of my life without too many cares and concern regarding the future. And somehow in assisting me to do exactly that, I suddenly realize how much happier I am, content with being loved, feeling "in love", and learning to love being me.
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