Tuesday, February 12, 2008

A Sad State of Affairs...

Earlier today, I ventured outside, in the cold, snow, and sleeting weather and made my way out to the studio. I hesitated to even open the door, not knowing what state or condition it would be in after the recent upheaval of moving Amber and Chris' items from storage there into their new home. I was remembering, quite clearly, the "rush" to get their things loaded up using our truck, our Jeep, and a family member of theirs, Brandon's car loaded up. As I flipped the switch to turn on the lights, my first impression was of how much room I now have! My second thought was "what a mess!" I discovered some items from the garage had to be moved so that they could get to what was previously stored there was now in my studio! A few pieces of furniture that we own had to be moved out of the way. My rug and leather recliner, that we specifically purchased for use there are now located within our home and in its place is a larger blue recliner that we exchanged. My much loved Tina Chaden artwork is in the recliner, along with so many other items that I attempted to bring into our home to make our home the "home" I desired it to be. I loved one half of our living room, but there was no "ebb" or "flow" or anything that seemed to bring some sense of balance or order to our home. So those items were packed up in boxes and returned to the studio. What a mess I've made!!! It felt somewhat heart-wrenching. I worked for a bit, clearing off the back work bench, picking up this, that, the other, re-locating like or similar things together, and as I worked my heart broke a little bit more as I began remember all the hopes and the dreams I once had for it and the art that I so desired to create there. I had to leave, to come back into our home as I had put Chaos outside, and upon hearing his whining, discovered it is now raining sleet. Poor puppy! As I turned out the lights and reached to close the door, my heart whispered, "I'll be back. I promise to lovingly begin to take care of you." I felt my spirit begin to soar....{smile}

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