What to do with, "I am an Artist!" logistics

There I sat, with a startling self-discovery. All the hard work of the self-assessment finally began to pay off. I was who I knew I was all along, but yet I had changed in a very dramatic way!

I was now armed with the ability to assess each and every obstacle, inner critic thought, myth, fact, and some fictions that I'd discovered along the journey. I decided right there and then my journey wasn't done, for it was simply a place to begin from. That knowledge was so powerful! that I had to write it the chalkboard hanging within wall of my studio.... "this is the place to begin from!" Day after day, when I arrived within the studio regardless of what goal I set out to accomplish, there is was in black and white! The revelation and the realizaition that I had made. Me! and All by myself! After wading in the muck and mire, walking away disgusted, thinking I was wasting even more of my precious and most valuable time, I made a breakthrough! Now what am I going to do with that knowledge?

Well, first and foremost, this is about my journey! It's about ME! my art, my work and that is where I chose for it to stay. I wanted to reach out, to scream from the rooftops, "Look at me! Look at what I've accomplished!" but in my heart, I knew my work wasn't done, for it was simply beginning. But going through the process was torture and I had finally arrived unscathed out the other side. I now had the oppportunity to look long and hard at my own list. I now had the opportunity to either push them aside and stay where I was at or I had the opportunity to look them all in the face once more and turn the negatives into positives and to highlight my own accomplishments that I am so proud of! and that my friends, is where I am today!

I know where I desire to go, to be what I desire to be, to do what I desire to do! I am armed with the obstacles that get in my way, the inhibit and paralyze me, and that knowledge is power! I am aware of my own self-defeating behaviors for I have learned to recognize them and I am ever so hopeful that I will begin to recognize them in my future. But more importantly, I am hopeful to recognize them for what they actually are, creative blocks that prevent me from being the real "Me" that I know is waiting desparately for the "Me" Iam now to simply "become."